This morning, I had a brief discussion with a colleague that got me thinking.
“Its easy to feel beautiful at home, or around friends and family – because they know who you are”, she said. “But as I got older, I was told to be intelligent; to burn hearts with brilliance and engulf souls with compassion in order to be considered beautiful”.
That’s the thing, beauty is such a complicated concept, because we all have different ideas of what it should look and feel like – yet we all want to feel beautiful.
There is no seeker among those who search for beauty, who hasn’t matured on the way. The moment you start to re-define what it means to be beautiful, you start to change within and without.
Yeah sure, we all get those fleeting moments of momentary bliss when we adorn that dress we love so much, or when we wear that make-up which personifies us as some kind of immediate, flawless Goddess.
But feeling beautiful is actually about self love and acceptance.
It is about a work in progress that is slowly, yet inevitably moving towards perfection.
It is about a spiritual understanding of beauty, where we are all deemed as unfinished works of art – waiting and striving to be completed.
It is about saying, I might not look like you, but isn’t humanity a fine art of skilled penmanship, where every single dot is equally important for the entire picture?
Often when we feel our most beautiful, we are loving and embracing certain things about ourselves – the ‘perfect’, unblemished and infallible. But this is the easy part.
What is far more difficult is to love ourselves with all our imperfections and defects. The lesson here is, remember, there is no wisdom without unconditional love. Unless we learn to love ourselves wholly and completely, irrespective of surface value, we can neither truly love ourselves.
A life without self-love is of no account. Self love is what we all have inside of us, clouded and sheltered by our insecurities and our need for acceptance. There is only one type of dirt that cannot be cleansed with pure water, and that is the stain of hatred and bigotry contaminating the soul. You can purify your body through abstinence and fasting, but only love will purify your heart.
Learn to love yourself.
The quest to be beautiful will always be an unattainable ideal, one that will continue to define and re-defined itself – ever so dependent on the spirit of the age or popular culture.
No, we are not that fluid.
The truth is, we are all perfect, capable of immense and unconditional love.
But we came here to learn personal love. Universal love. Messy love. We didn’t come here to be beautiful. We already are. We came here to be gorgeously human – flawed and fabulous.
Beautiful is the woman who keeps her head up and is proud of her body, just as it is. Beautiful is the man who has to hide his gay lover from his judgmental parents, but who loves, regardless of what the world will think. Beautiful are the women who buy the jeans that fit them, not the ones they hope will fit one day; the people who wear what they want because they like it. Beautiful are the people who choose love. Beautiful are the people who allow their bodies to be their temples and canvases, and who create their outer beings to reflect their inner. Beautiful are the people who hurt and feel insecure and make mistakes—but rise above, and find confidence and admit when they’re wrong.
Beautiful is everyday. Beautiful is the struggle and the triumph.
Beautiful is you and me.
Stay beautiful xo